Death, I suppose that life is the tense before

This morning I got to work at 7am and was greeted with the most existential e-mail I have had in a while. Actually this ranks up with the most existential call i recieved about 2 years ago at work. Both have to do with the death of a friend at the hands of a freak bicycle accident.
But today i am only really concerned with today's existential experience. So here goes my cyber processing of this event.
I get to work and start the day checking my e-mail. I receieved an e-mail from my friends in Rawanda (yes the country). So usually the e-mail i get them are updates on their none profit that is building schools in Rawanda. However, the subject was omonious. It was simply "Ben." For some reason the period spoke volumes. Thus it was the end of Ben. So it was a short and probably the best way to get the news. Here is what the beginning of the e-mail said:
"This is a very difficult e-mail to write. You may have heard by now but I wanted to make sure you knew that our dear friend and brother in the Lord, Ben Farrant, died at 1:20 pm on Thursday after his bike was hit from behind by a car. He was so special to many of us and I am really struggling to understand God’s purpose right now...."
So this starts a tough day of seeing clients and remembering all the funny and good times that I had shared with Ben. Those of which I may share someday, or just keep to myself and my friends that knew him.
The existential part comes when I realize that he was the same age as I was, and has had a similar experience that I have had, and not that is done for him. It feels like standing at the edge of the beach with open ocean and it scares the shit out of me.
Sure there is the theological comfort of I can say i knwo where he is and all those things people say to comfort you. But really it doesn't help with the loss and realization how life can end so suddenly and in such a messed up way.
To be honnest as a Christian and as a Therapist, I should know how to handle this stuff but really I don't, and to be honnest I don't think at 26, i really should understand this stuff.
All I can pray is "thy will be done." But damn it I just don't get it at the moment... or at all as it has felt lately. But then again I realize is that "all i know is that I don't know"
Wow only two blogs and I have gotten depressing. I thought it would take a week or two.